6 Relationship Sabotagers

Healthy relationships are vital for enhancing every day living. Have you ever been around someone and their presence makes you feel good when they walk in the room? Have you every held a conversation with someone and when they leave you felt worst than before? I have experienced both . We have relationships with family, spouses, coworkers, children, business partners and each is different. Here are six of the roadblocks and there are many more.

  1. Unrealistic expectations- Expecting someone to be just like us instead of being their unique self.
  2. Lack of Communication- Choosing not to express the real need or what is expected. Instead we choose to leave hints and hope the individual gets the message. Sometimes giving the silent treatment due to surppressed anger.
  3. Assuming everything is alright in the relationship and the significant other has already withdrawn . Assuming an individual is happy and they are not. Assuming things will automatically get better without trying.
  4. Jealous or Envious of an individual relationship with other people. Jealous of another person gifts, talents, position, family, accomplishments etc.
  5. Feeling the need to compete and compare with someone else. Having the need to out do someone else for selfish gain is a roadblock.
  6. Unresolved emotional issues such as suppressing feelings that turns into bitterness,resentment, unforgiveness and sometimes hatred.

We can overcome these roadblocks by doing the following:

  1. Replace unrealistic expectations with accepting that everyone is unique and differences should compliment and enhance relationships instead of bringing conflict.Communicate realistic expectations and boundaries.
  2. Replace lack of communication with talking about what is desired or needed. We should really listen without distractions. Set aside a time to talk about serious matters.
  3. Replace assuming with asking specific questions ahead of time and prepare. We should be fact based rather than assume or be suspicious.
  4. Replace jealousy or envy with celebrating other people successes. Acknowledge the feeling and let go. Speak and think positively about yourself and do a self inventory.
  5. Instead of competing or comparing in a negative way replace it with discovering your unique talents and be grateful for what you have obtained.
  6. Replace emotional outburst with taking time out to breathe and pay attention to triggers when becoming angry. Sometimes although it may be painful revisit some childhood situations that may have occurred that resurface in relationships.

We can all work on our relationships. We all desire to have happy and healthy non toxic relationships. It is very possible. Here are five of the relationship roadblocks and there are many more.

Linda P. Thompson, Published Author Speaker, Lifestyle and Health Coach

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http://www.lindathompson.org

Wisdom and Instinct

Thought for today as the old saying goes” always follow your gut” which is our instinct,insight, that quiet little voice that say don’t do this or that , don’t go here or there, not now but later. I remember my mama use to say not now ,doesn’t feel right, the time isn’t right. Timing is everything. Wisdom is key. Shalom Peace Love!

It Cost Nothing To Be Kind

Let’s try to be kind and thoughtful each day. There are many who are not use to kindness because of their pains from the past. However it is our mission to say a kind word , or do a wonderful deed to make someone happy. A smile, a hug and a thank you can go along way. Holding the door open for someone is an act of kindness. It doesn’t cost anything to be kind. It is priceless. Shalom Peace Love.

Let Go Of Negativity

We are all humans and we have feelings that are not always good . When negative thoughts occur and they will ,we must acknowledge and let go. Most negative feelings aren’t true and is a fear of something that might happen. We should strive or replace negativity quickly with something positive. We must allow ourselves to feel however if what we are feeling isn’t beneficial we need to let it go. Shalom Peace Love!